From Broken to Whole
By Bridgett, HJ Participant
My abuse really started when I was young being bullied and beaten by classmates. I learned of pain at an early age and it damaged my self-worth. It would perpetuate throughout my life.
My abuser was my husband whom I would later divorce. He would shake me like a rag doll, punch holes in the wall past my head, stand over me yelling and pulling me up from a sitting position so his face was in my face, shove me around, and take my money. He would mess with my mind and make me believe no one else would want me and it was always my fault. If I would only do what was being asked of me there would not be a problem—or so he said. He would use inappropriate words to attack me. My pain lasted for two years until I found the strength to get out and ask my family for help.
My future relationships would include abuse because my sense of value was so low. These men were very jealous and would require all of my time.
The damage to my soul was so deep that I would use alcohol and crush up Tylenol to numb the pain of my life.
My longest abusive relationship lasted 30 years. I loved this man and believed he was the best for me. When the relationship was good it was good, and when the relationship was bad it was bad. The abuse changed me and made me feel embarrassed, ashamed and humiliated. I blamed myself. The abuse made me battle with God’s law and trying to figure out what was wrong with me.
I heard about ARMS’ Her Journey program when it was announced at a Sunday church service. At the beginning of the program my fight or flight response was high. I did not know what to expect from the program. I really needed the program. With each class I gained a piece of myself back. The ARMS class brought me closer to the word of God.
The broken pieces were finally fitting back into place and I was finding out who I was. ARMS was a place of healing, love, comfort, peace, and faith of a better life with abundant joy. I learned to have protection and order in my life. Through ARMS Her Journey I was able to forgive my abusers and myself. I have gained so much knowledge. Most importantly, I learned about God’s peace, protection, and HIS love for me. I am free of bondage and the weight over my life has been lifted, I can hold my head up and feel confident.
Abuse Recovery Ministry and Services Her Journey program lives up to what it states:
- God was with me in the valley
- God walked with me through the dark times
- God is the light to my future
This is a program worth supporting because it delivers the hope and healing through God that it promises.
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