I married my best friend. Our love story was sweet but unbeknownst to me, my husband had darkness inside him.
Several years into our marriage, his temper would flare and be frightening to be around. We would start conversations that would morph into arguments that left me bewildered and so very confused. I began to walk on eggshells in fear. He would accuse me of not being supportive, or not listening, or not being respectful. It left me desperate to be a better wife and I began to think I was responsible for his abusive behavior.
The abuse escalated and there were not many moments of peace. The arguments became more frequent, and our children were no longer enough to hold him in check. I will never forget the look of fear in their eyes. In one event he pushed me against the wall, bruising my shoulders, our oldest daughter would begin to wear headphones to bed to block out the arguing.
The culminating moment where I knew I could no longer live in such danger started with a discussion, that quickly morphed. While yelling, he backed me into the laundry room and he head-butted me, leaving a bruise on my cheek.
This is where the miracle began, where ARMS began the process of helping to bring healing to our broken family. The next day, I broke down in tears and began to tell a friend what happened. She spoke the words that rescued me. “Jessica, all you need to do right now, is get you and your children safe. Whatever that looks like, whatever you need to do, you put all your energy into getting ALL of you safe. I don’t know if this will help, but my friend told me about this website called ARMS.”
I hung up, went to the ARMS website, and clicked on the link “How do you know if you are being abused?” As I began to answer the questions, I dropped my head and began to weep tears of sorrow and relief. I could see that I was not crazy. I could now name what was happening and move forward in healing.
I went to class every week and began my education around domestic violence. I was reminded of how precious I am, that I am beautiful in my heavenly father’s eyes; that while I am flawed and my marriage had issues, abuse in any form is never okay. The Her Journey program put me on my road to healing from abuse.
My confidence has replaced my shame. Through ARMS, God has orchestrated such healing and I am more in love than ever with a heavenly Father that could bring such beauty from ashes.
For every $75 we receive, we can provide this 15-week recovery program for a victim of domestic violence.