by Annalise

This is the story of a pug. Before I tell you about how I got Arthur, I have to tell you that I was in an abusive relationship with a guy named Terrance. He started off sweet, but he soon turned controlling and manipulative. He fed me lies about my family. He used his faith to manipulate me into obedience to him. He made degrading comments about me in front of others. He took my money and refused to pay me back. He demanded that I text him at least every two hours to give him my whereabouts. In the end, he snuck into my home and into my bedroom in the middle of night when I didn’t text him back. That was the last straw.

A few months before I gained enough courage to end things with him, I expressed the desire for a dog. He tried to talk me out of it, telling me that a dog would suck up all of my time and money and only bring me heartache (ironic, huh?). The thing was, I’d always wanted a dog, and the timing seemed right. I was feeling very lonely and depressed, and I had a constant sense of hopelessness. I had fleeting thoughts of killing myself to get out of my situation (which I now realize was fueling my depression). These thoughts terrified me, and I knew a dog would only help me. I put my foot down and told him that he didn’t have any say on the matter.

Adoption Event

We went to an adoption event. Most of the dogs received lots of attention and offers of adoption. The only one that didn’t was a pug named Arthur. He was 12, completely deaf, had hair loss due to a wheat allergy, and most of his teeth were missing. He appeared to be on the tail-end of his life. Terrance urged me towards Arthur saying “If you want a dog immediately, you better take that one. No one else wants him.” I’d wanted a younger dog; a dog that would be with me for years to come. I caved (because I always caved) and I adopted geriatric Arthur. In hindsight, I recognize that Terrance assumed I wouldn’t have Arthur for very long, that I would lose him soon and run crying to Terrance. And then he would be able to whisper “I told you so” and be the heroic, comforting boyfriend.

Regardless, I fell in love with Arthur and I’m happy to say that he long outlasted Terrance. Arthur brought me joy that fueled my confidence, and companionship that helped me see what real love was. With his uncanny resemblance to a cantankerous old man, he taught me to laugh again, and he didn’t judge or manipulate me when I cried. I’m out of that abusive relationship, and Arthur helped me get here. When I was ready, Arthur helped me find new, true, honest love with my now husband, Trent. Trent created a bond with Arthur and grew to love him immensely.

Arthur Helped Heal

Ultimately, Trent and I had Arthur for 4 and a half years. He passed just before his 17th birthday last year, peacefully in his sleep. We grieved more than we thought possible. With the help of Arthur, I got out of a toxic relationship. Because of Arthur, I found and married Trent. And with Arthur, we made a home together. He’s gone…but he left me with so much. I’ll always be grateful to him for being my friend when I desperately needed one.

ALL cases of domestic homicide begin with domestic violence, be it verbal, physical, emotional, psychological (etc.). The best way to decrease family homicide is to tackle the issue of domestic violence. If you’re either in a domestic violence situation or have already left and need some healing, please contact us at 503-846-9284 or email.

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